You are Not a Victim

These words changed and continue to change the course of my life and I pray that you would see the truth in them too. Good or bad, successful or unsuccessful, happy or sad, fair or unfair – you own your life.

“You are accountable for your life. You have always been accountable. You will always be accountable. If you don't like your job, you are accountable. If your relationships are on the rocks, you are accountable. If you are overweight, you are accountable. If you are not happy, you are accountable.” (Phillip McGraw, Life Strategies Page 56)

You are not a victim. This may not be easy to accept for some, nonetheless it is the real deal. It is a deal breaker. Responsibility begins when you accept this truth. Responsibility is about accepting that you make decisions in your life and that you own the consequences for those decisions. Good or bad.

You are not a victim

It is not the weather, neither is it your angry boss nor is it your parents' fault. It is not the government, nor is it the economy. No, your husband is not at fault, your children are also not the cause of your problems and your wife didn't ruin your life.

Maybe you went through a traumatic loss, rejection or experience such as physical rape, when you were a child. You might not have had the knowledge or power to make certain choices as a child and therefore you were not accountable then.

From the point when you had the knowledge or power to make choices, you became accountable for your life.

The past is behind us and the future is not yet with us. We deal in the present because this is where we are. Today is the present, it is God's gift to us.

You choose now how to respond to everything that happened in your life.

Here is what a victim says: “They are all out to get me.”

Here is what an accountable person says, “I am responsible.”

Are you honest about getting well or do you just want to manipulate others with your condition?

A victim seeks to draw sympathy and excuse themselves from the problems in their lives. They complain, pout, blame, everyone and everything else apart from themselves. They seem to desire change but all they draw to themselves are the circumstances they endlessly complain about.

An accountable person is the one who realizes they are responsible for every choice and every consequence in their lives. They own the problem, they accept that they are part of the problem and also own the task of finding a solution.

Do you want to get well? If yes, accept accountability for your life. If no, remember you are not a victim.

What are your thoughts? How has realizing that you are not a victim changed the course of your life?

photo credit: John Steven Fernandez via photopin cc

John 5:6-7 (Message Version)

When Jesus saw him stretched out by the pool and knew how long he had been there, he said, “Do you want to get well?”
⁷ The sick man said, “Sir, when the water is stirred, I don’t have anybody to put me in the pool. By the time I get there, somebody else is already in.”